


Night, My Sky

by burpyboi



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Angst, Death, M/M, Mostly Canon Compliant, Neil Josten doesn’t know when to shut up but x-games mode that’s what this is, and u can kinda see it in this so yEehAw, boy is literally dying i can’t exactly have people kissing, i could honestly but no, i hc andrew’s first ily as him given neil the keys to his car, okay i ramble sorry, so don’t come for me, so while neil doesn’t really know it andrew loves him, the relationships are implied heavily
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:06:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26561116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/burpyboi/pseuds/burpyboi
Summary: Riko pushed Neil hard during his two (three) week trial. This is what might have happened if Neil pushed back harder.If anyone attacks Jean I will throw hands my boy is trying his best.
Relationships: Kevin Day/Neil Josten, Kevin Day/Riko Moriyama, Neil Josten & Jean Moreau, Neil Josten & Riko Moriyama, Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard
Comments: 8
Kudos: 61





	Night, My Sky

**Author's Note:**

> TW: major character death, mild reference to canonical torture. Let’s go.

It was so dark. Neil’s being ached with every shuddering breath and his eyes could barely bare to stay open, and yet all he could think was he wished he could see the sky one last time. 

His own darkness- not this twisted version. 

Riko had offered before it all started and Neil had shut him down. But he didn’t want the typical sky blue it had been that day anyway. He wanted his sky; the layers of black and grey - his favourite colour, even if a certain violent blond claimed it wasn’t a colour - mixing and melting into a soothing backdrop. Only a single star some nights, sometimes not even that. Hardly the picture perfect sky for most people; so polluted and blank. Kind of reminded him of a certain picture perfect guy he knew.

Andrew certainly was polluted, wasn’t he? And typically blank. But just like the night sky, that blankness hid so many layers of beauty and wonder. Neil felt a fresh dampness to his eyes as he realised he wouldn’t ever get to explore his sky. 

He hoped, at the very least, even if he didn’t get to see his sky anymore, that he’d saved it from further pollution. That he’d protected it from something. 

Neil wasn’t thinking about the sky anymore. But it hurt too much to be real. Once a liar, always a liar.

“ I have to kill you. “ 

Neil blinked dumbly, registering the voice - Jean’s - after a few long, dull moments. It was all dull. Everything was so... faded. Fading. He wondered if this is how his sky felt- if that was why that blankness coated his depths too often. Natural, when there’s too much to feel. Or when you’re dying. 

Was Neil dying?

That was when the words registered. Jean was telling him he was going to kill him. But Jean was attached to his hip- killing Neil was like killing himself. Jean didn’t hate Neil that much and he certainly had a strong sense of self-preservation. They were two halves of a shitty whole. 

And then Neil coughed - heavy and deep, the action seemingly causing his heart to stutter - and he knew regardless of what Jean did, he was dead. The trickle of liquid running out of the side of his mouth was so warm and gentle, Neil could almost mistake it for a goodbye caress. 

He didn’t know anybody who would touch him so gently. He liked to believe maybe his sky would have, one day. But not now. 

Neil’s sky was locked away, never to be seen by him again. Just like the real sky. Except maybe he would be buried under the real sky. Neil didn’t mind the thought of that too much. Hopefully there would be enough to bury. He didn’t want his ashes to blow away like his Mother’s had. He wanted to stay. 

Maybe the caress... it was an angel’s touch. Nobody he knew. Someone kind, like Renee. Renee would probably be better than an angel. She’d chosen to be kind despite her tragic beginning. But Neil didn’t know if she’d caress him so gently.

No, it was nicer to imagine it was someone he hadn’t lied to. Someone who had witnessed his sins and repeated mistakes- who knew his identity more that Neil did himself - and still decided to caress his face so tenderly anyway. 

It wasn’t possible, but Neil felt so tired and shattered that maybe dreaming he was redeemable and forgivable in someone’s eyes wasn’t so wrong. That he was worth comforting. Unbelievable, but he chose to.

He chose to believe as Jean bit back another sob.

“ If I don’t, he’s going to kill me. “

Neil didn’t bother telling Jean he was dead no matter what. He was relatively sure Jean knew that deep down, he was just much too attached to the idea of being alive to accept his reality. 

Neil barely remembered how it had come to this, but he could imagine. Riko had snapped. Neil didn’t remember the exacts of what he’d said to push him so far, but it had to be Kevin-related. Something Neil had said as Riko carved the number four into his cheek, branding him like a pig. 

Riko broke Neil. Leaving him red and blue and branded and open and vulnerable. “ You can’t hide anymore, Nathaniel. “ 

Neil broke Riko. “You will obsess over him for the rest of his life, you will preserve his memory for as long as you can, but the only face he dreams of at night is mine. I’m the only one in this room he longs for anymore. “

A shot in the dark. Neil honestly wasn’t sure how much truth there was in his bold claim, but when he heard the snap of his fingers in Riko’s hand he knew he’d hit the nerve. And he couldn’t help but smile through the pain, even as he remained brutally aware of the resemblance to his father. 

So now Riko would kill them both. Probably more, if this didn’t satisfy him. If his uncle didn’t reign him in. 

Neil wasn’t sure how he felt about the image in his head of a piling body count, but he felt a sick satisfaction as he imagined the domino effect his death would cause. The Ravens wouldn’t be able to hide every trail- it wasn’t possible. That’s what he told himself anyway.

Jean could get away. If he only had the strength to realise he could. But Neil recognised the panic in his voice, caught a glimpse of his hunched shoulders and knew. Jean was in a corner he’d run into. Boxed in, with nowhere to go. Dead.

The question was... would he kill Neil? 

Neil looked up at the crushing black ceiling that creeped closer with every painful breath and found he didn’t care.

Neil distantly hoped he would choose whichever provided Jean the least grief. God knows he’d experienced too much agony. Neil didn’t know how far his care for Jean extended or when he’d even started to care at all, but it was authentic.

And for some reason that felt nice. 

Maybe that’s why he fought with his locked jaw to share what he presumed would be his last words with the raven-haired Raven.

“ You deserved better. “

Jean hiccuped then stilled, obviously in disbelief that those words could have possibly been said to him. By him- by anyone.

“ What? “ 

Every word was faint and forced, but Neil was determined to at the very least ease Jean’s guilt. Whatever fucked up shit had happened, Neil still wholeheartedly believed Jean still needed and deserved the comfort of his own angel. Probably more than Neil did. 

“ Do what you need to do. I forgive you. “

And with that last word, Neil’s last ounce of strength had been used- down to the very last drop. 

His eyes closed and all he could do was think of his night sky and let the tension drain from his body. He was ready now. 

Loud wet sniff. Unintelligible murmurs. The familiar press of a blade to his throat-

“ Night, my sky. “ 

And suddenly Neil Josten, Nathaniel Wesninski, Calum Park, Sasha Westfield, Julian Dubois- everyone he had ever pretended to be - was gone. 

The darkness claimed him.


End file.
